Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Runner math: 12 rounds up to 13.1

When you work retail and are training for a marathon, some Tuesdays end up being long run days.  I'm on week 2 of 'official' marathon training and so I had a 12 miler to do this week.  So after sleeping in, getting my coffee and breakfast, finishing reading the newspaper and doing the crossword, it was time to run.
I complained about losing my thoughts once I arrived at the white screen in my last bloop so I tried really hard to connect the miles with my insane thoughts.

Fair warning: bodily functions are mentioned in this post.

Mile 1: It is cold. I cannot feel my feet. Why didn't I wear gloves? I am such a pansy; it is 40 degrees outside and some runners are fine in subzero temperatures. 

Mile 2: Find a cadence. Find a cadence. Find a cadence.  Oooo, I like this song.  I wonder if people would tell me their favorite speed song and/or their favorite LSD song if I posted a question in Loopville?

Mile 3: Oh hello fingers, it is nice that you have feeling again.

Mile 4: 2 dudes with their shirts off running.  Guess it got warmer huh?  Nope, there's a lady walking and she's bundled up like an Eskimo.  I like this new shirt.  I should buy more of them in other colors.

Mile 5: My favorite part of the Greenway.  Wheee!!! I really, really want to jump the fence and run through the cow field one day.  But I'm afraid of getting in trouble.  And I'd probably leap into a cow patty.  Better stick to gleefully running next to the cow field.  Would it be weird if I laid down on the sidewalk and took an Instagram photo of the wintery, watery boardwalk? Yes, I should probably not lay down and take pictures.  Besides, then I'd have to stop.

Mile 6: Well, I could just stop at mile 6 and turn around like my training plan says. Orrrrrrr, I could go to the end of the trailhead and use the facilities AND run 13.1+.  Well, 12 is practically 13.1.  I might as well do a half--what's another 1.1 miles?  And thus, the blog title is born. 

Mile 7: Definitely a good idea to keep going. The facility is much needed.  My apologies to the lady in the stall next to me... Refilling my water bottles is a good idea too.  Eat a lemon-lime Gu.  It's cold and doesn't squish out very easily.  I rush off on the second half of the run.

Mile 8: Pull myself back. Start thinking about how even though I don't really do organized religion, I do spend some time talking to God while I run.  We talk about all the insane stuff that fills my brain and sort a little bit out at a time.  On the euphoric runs, I am most thankful that we can chat about how lucky I am.

Mile 9: It gets silly.  "Call Me Maybe" inspires a whole different line of thinking.  I miss the Olympics and baseball.  How many days until spring training? I really, really want to do a cartwheel in the middle of my run.  How cool would it be if I did a cartwheel across the finish line of the marathon? This cannot be an original idea...I must remember to try to see if there are any YouTube videos of such antics.  Chrissie Wellington would body roll over the finish line, so this isn't too crazy, right?

Mile 10: Running across the intersection, jamming to my music, blowing a snot rocket.  Oh my, did I just blow a snot rocket in front of like, 15 cars? Could I not have waited 90 seconds to go around the curve and do it out of the view of others? Yup, I just blew boogers all over the place and didn't think twice about it.  Where are those shirtless boys now?

Mile 11: I definitely want a smoothie when I get home.  Kale, pear, and mandarins.  Yeah, that sounds good.  And a piece of leftover pepperoni pizza.  Ha!  That reminds me of my tweet last week: water cancels beer, celery cancels wings.  This fantasy world I live in is absolutely fantastic!

Mile 12: Well, I haven't really been paying attention to my Garmin today, but I suppose I could see what's going on.  Oh fancy, I'm running just slightly below the pace I ran my Thanksgiving half in! Sweet, if I push the next mile, I will easily slide right under.

Mile 13: Run, run, run, run, run, run.  There is no time to think when I am pushing the pace 40 seconds fast this mile than the previous 12 miles.  Good thing my brain finally shut up! It gets so crazy up there!

Mile 13.5: Ahhh, that felt so good.  I want to give that run a hug!!!! Look ma, marathon training can be so much fun!

Splits: 8:17, 8:17, 8:26, 8:06, 8:18, 8:15, 8:11, 8:18, 8:08, 8:08, 8:10, 8:13, 7:29, last .5 in 4:00

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